


omnia vincit amor, et nos cedamus amori.

by flustraaa



Series: the one where they're in college [7]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Dynamics, Good Brother Jace Wayland, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Other, Parabatai Feels, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, Sad Alec Lightwood, Scared Alec Lightwood, bestie for the resties, comforting jace wayland, emtionally hurt alec lightwood, non sexual intimacy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 01:57:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19219264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flustraaa/pseuds/flustraaa
Summary: (Latin) "Love conquers all things, so we too shall yield to love."from the author virgil.!!this isn’t jalec and in no way shape or form do i (or will i ever) condone jalec. please stop commenting about it. boys can have emotions too and if you dont like my writing pls just don’t say anything!!! the comments currently reek of toxic masculinity and homophobic standards!!! boys can be close and not want kiss!! it’s a thing!! wow!!!





	omnia vincit amor, et nos cedamus amori.

**Author's Note:**

> "hey so idk how to tell u dis but i really like boyyyyysss."  
> "right on brosef, ope, nope, waiiiitt u r crying dis is bad."

There’s no movement in the form, apart from Jace’s occasional page turn and pencil movement. Jace has decided on the spur of a moment that this quarter capstone must go completely correct, because  _ ‘if I can’t get one hundred percent on a math test how can I teach it? Let alone discover new things _ ?’ 

If he’s being honest, Alec’s truly no all too surprised. Jace has always had an affinity for minor obsessive fits, especially when it comes to his major of choice. Alec rotates against the bed, he can see that Jace is holding his breath—as if breathing would wake up the kid. As Magnus and Jace have brought up on multiple occasions that he, _'sleeps like the dead'_. He lets his eyes settle shut, just as Jace begins to turn to check on his brother.

Alec takes note as the light disappears from the general direction of his lofted bed back to Jace’s textbook page. Alec flickers his eyes back open, focusing on Jace. 

There’s a pair of speckled glasses on his face, and his hair is a birds nest on his head.  _ No one sees him like this _ , Alec thinks briefly,  _ it’s like he’s a different Jace.  _

Which Alec knows is utterly untrue, he remembers how years ago Jace would rush into Alec’s room on the brink of tears because he didn’t understand rational expressions. Jace punished himself of ways that Alec can both relate to but also doesn’t think he’ll ever fully understand. 

Jace takes concepts that push him to his breaking point, just so that when he overcomes it’s that much sweeter. Alec remembers telling his those words sophomore year when Jace had to lay on to the floor with his hands over his eyes to try and calm himself down from calculus three. 

But moreover, he remembers Jace’s simple response: _ I learned from the best. At least I let people help me.  _

Alec had been offended, but now, he supposes it might be time to let someone help him. 

“Jace?” He murmurs, voice dipping with the crackling vibrations. 

He watches the light move once twice into the air, accompanied by his brothers, " _shit, shit, nope_ ," before landing on the floor. He can feel the vibration of the snort that he’d tried to suppress leave his nose. 

Jace fumbles to the wall, flipping on the light, causing them both to wince- but now Alec can actually see his brother.

Within a second, Jace is standing beside Alec, hands gripping the side of the bed frame, head just above Alec’s horizontal being. 

“I gotta tell you something,” Alec mutters, eyes finding a rather uninteresting paint chip in the ceiling above. He sees Jace’s nod from his peripheral, and he continues on, unnerved. 

“I...uh...I’m... I like guys?” He turns to look at Jace who nods softly. His eyes are understanding in a way that makes Alec question if Jace understands what he’s saying, “No, like... I want to... like... _kiss_ ‘em?” 

Jace’s eyebrows furrow and he nods slower this time, "Yeah, buddy, I know."

“ _Oh_ ,” Alec blurts, azure eyes fixating on the ceiling once more, “Cool.” 

Jace slips two fingers against his jaw, turning Alec’s head, ultimately forcing Alec’s eyes to meet his. As soon as Alec’s eyes are looking up, Jace retracts his hand, dropping it to his side. 

"You okay? You seem _..."  _ He  pauses for a long moment, trying to think of his next phrase, " unsure? overwhelmed?"

Alec shrugs, helplessly. 

Jace’s eyebrows furrow for a moment, eyes searching Alec’s eyes for truths he doesn’t want to admit.

Then, slowly- hesitantly, "Is  this a Magnus thing?" __ Alec starts to shake his head, before nodding biting his bottom lip. 

Somethings are too important not to say out loud. 

“I’m  _ gay _ , Jace," and suddenly, Alec feels like he's been completely swallowed by the tidal wave that's been looming for years.

Jace nods, eyes filled with concern and waterlines beginning to drown in tears. 

“And that’s okay, brother. Alec, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that,” his hands move with his mouth- and whether it’s to emphasise or ensure Alec comprehends the truth behind it, the raven-haired man isn’t fully sure.

Either way, it does exactly what it’s supposed to. Alec nods and Jace sighs, gesturing for Alec to scoot over. Jace jumps up, before plopping his ass down next to Alec’s chest.  

“Don’t you need to be studying?” Alec asks, voice breaking with emotion. 

“No, you’re more important to me,” Jace declares as if it's a clear matter, and the sureness on his face makes Alec feel a comfort that he didn’t realise he needed. 

Alec nods slowly and Jace closes his eyes to collect his thoughts before opening them again. 

“You gonna make it, buddy? Do you need water?” He asks, patting Alec chest shoulder before returning his hand to his own lap. 

Alec lets out a shuttering breath, “Can you just sit with me until I fall asleep?” 

“Course,” He murmurs, shuffling to grab Alec’s extra pillow, setting it on his lap before patting. 

Alec shuffles up, laying his head against the pillow on Jace’s lap and Jace rests a warm hand on his shoulder.

Just as Alec finds himself drifting into obscurity he murmurs- or at least tries- he’s not quite sure what actually comes out, “Thanks.” 

To Jace, who ruffles his hair in response before returning a hand to Alec’s shoulder, and by his next exhale, Alec's asleep. 


End file.
